My fiancé and I were living on the island of St. Croix when we decided to get married on St. John, a popular Caribbean wedding destination in the United States Virgin Islands. Of the three U.S. Virgin Islands, we thought the pristine, unspoiled beaches, breathtaking harbor views, and luxury vacation accommodations would make St. John a beautiful backdrop for our wedding and a once-in-a-lifetime experience for our guests. We had two months to prepare.

Unexpected Setbacks

As with most destination weddings, expect your confirmed guest list to be smaller than it would be if you decided to get married in your hometown. Because St. John is the most difficult of the three islands to get to, we realized that the cost and distance from the mainland would prevent some loved ones from attending.

To get to the island, you need to take a plane to St. Thomas, usually with a layover in Puerto Rico, and then take a ferry to St. John. The bride and groom will need to make a stop at the St. Thomas courthouse to pick up their marriage license. Having sent the paper work and fee to the courthouse at least eight working days before your arrival, all you have to do is show your ID to the clerk and you'll be on your way. No one else can pick up the marriage license for you and both of you have to be present. Marriage licenses are not given out in St. John, only in St. Thomas.

Even with a small guest list of about two-dozen people, the biggest problems we ran into were securing accommodations for our guests and finding a venue to hold our wedding reception in. There are only a small handful of hotels on St. John. In fact, the majority of vacation rentals are luxurious villas overlooking the sea. These villas, however, are quite expensive. Our family and friends rented larger villas with four or more bedrooms to help share the costs.

We decided to get married on the beach, choosing Trunk Bay because of its beautiful sunsets. The best times to get married on the beach are in the morning or evening, when the temperatures are more comfortable. Our wedding was in August, one of the hotter months of the year. However, the weather is spectacular all year on the island, so it doesn’t matter what time of year you get married: it’s always beautiful.

Finding a place to hold the wedding reception was the most difficult part of planning our St. John wedding because the majority of villa owners do not allow any kind of “party” to take place on their property, even a small wedding reception. On the other hand, there weren’t enough guests to rent a larger venue in one of the few hotels. Luckily, my soon to be mother-in-law was able to convince a villa owner to allow a small, catered, wedding reception at his villa for two reasons: the owner and myself are both native Rhode Islanders and my future mother-in-law agreed to a larger than normal deposit.

If you find yourself in the same predicament, here are a couple of tips that will help you secure a small wedding reception at a villa on St. John:

Although you may have your heart pulling you toward one particular villa, the fact is that all villas on St. John are stunning and, once you see the spectacular views from your veranda, it really won't matter where you and your guests eat your wedding cake, as long as you're together. Therefore, call as many villas as you can until one says "yes." Let them know you're willing to supply a larger damage deposit, if necessary. Also, let them know you're willing to hold the small party for an agreed upon amount of time and that the reception will be catered and cleaned up by professionals.

Another option might be to have a realtor or wedding planner negotiate for you. There are many professionals on the island who would be willing to help you find a villa to host your small wedding reception. Most of the villas are managed by property management companies and, with St. John being such a small island, everyone pretty much knows everyone else. If you don't have the time or patience to do the legwork, call a professional to help you. This will save a lot of time.

Getting Around St. John

Besides the downtown area, the rest of the island is not walkable. You and your guests will need to rent a jeep to get to your villa and see the rest of the island. I recommend a 4X4/all-terrain vehicle to maneuver the island's many curvy, steep, and barely negotiable driveways. We actually took out a wall trying to get around our driveway. There are many ditches along the roads in St. John and the possibility of sliding into one during a rainstorm is possible. Only a 4x4 is going to get you out. Also, keep in mind that St. John is extremely hilly with steep, windy roads and driving is done on the left-hand side. Some of our guests found driving on the island difficult to get used to.

What I Would Do Over

The biggest mistake I made when planning my destination wedding was hiring a friend to do the photography. Although she was a good photographer, she had just gotten a new camera and still hadn’t really learned how to use it. Needless to say, the pictures weren’t very good. In hindsight, I should have spent the extra money and gotten some beautiful, professional pictures done. I really regret that decision.

What To Do On St. John

When you have a destination wedding, you’re combining the wedding ceremony, reception, and honeymoon all in one place. What makes St. John unique for a destination wedding is that much of it has been designated as a national park area. This means that the entire island is yours to enjoy, without private residences claiming the most beautiful land as their own. With amazing beaches and lush vegetation, you can find lots of water sports and hiking activities. And, when the sun goes down, head downtown for a gourmet meal and a few drinks, or spend the evening dining at your villa and swimming in the pool under the night stars.

Although you don’t need a passport to visit the Virgin Islands, take one anyway. You won’t want to miss out on a charter daytrip, sailing to the British Virgin Islands, particularly Virgin Gorda with its crystal clear coves and Pirates of the Caribbean feel.

Tips for Planning the Odds and Ends

Since the majority of your planning can be done from home via email or over the phone, browse lots of vendor’s websites to plan for all the odds and ends and get the best prices. Before we left St. Croix, we had the cake picked out and set to be delivered, the bouquet designed and ordered, the caterer booked, and the person marrying us booked. Deposits can be done over the phone, through check, by mail, or on a vendor’s website. Once on the island, our best man took care of all these odds and ends, coordinating drop-off and pick-up times, while I spent the day getting ready.

Planning a wedding on St. John proved to be an easy journey, once we were able to secure a venue for our reception. While it can take a bit of flexibility and a number of phone calls to get what you want, anyone can have a perfect wedding and honeymoon on St. John.