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Learn from the first-hand experiences of others.

Slide background

Learn from the first-hand experiences of others.

Slide background

Learn from the first-hand experiences of others.

Slide background

Learn from the first-hand experiences of others.


person found Rosanne's experience helpful.

Did you?

The Situation

We had been married three and a half years, owned our own house in Summit, New Jersey, and had promising careers in New York City's Financial District. Add a baby to the mix to create the perfect professional parents scenario. So, we decided to start trying to get pregnant.

It only took one try and Baby #1 was conceived. My next-door neighbor dubbed me "Fertile Myrtle." Close the bedroom door and I was on my way to motherhood.

Problems and Issues Encountered

The morning sickness that lasted all day for the first four months; the unexpected aversions to my favorite foods, like cherry tomatoes, homemade spaghetti sauce, and low-fat milk; the absolute imperatives of red meat, spinach, and strawberries; the way anything around my waist felt wrong; these changes cropped up almost immediately.

Eight weeks into the pregnancy, I had what I thought was a miscarriage. My OB doc thought so too, but the morning sickness and other pregnancy indicators did not go away. A week later, we did an ultrasound — lo and behold, there was still a baby there. Seemed I had been carrying fraternal twins and had lost one, but kept the other. That was the most dramatic part of the experience.

After that particular emotional roller coaster settled down; the rest of my pregnancy was pretty close to textbook. By Christmas, I remember saying I was so contented, I could moo.

If a Do-Over Existed

If I could do the same pregnancy over again, the only big thing I would change is going on maternity leave sooner — at seven months, instead of eight — and not returning to work as soon as I did. I would have stayed at home for a year after my daughter was born. The financial world didn't need me then, my child did.

For Soon-to-be Parents

Learn as much as you can — without obsessing, of course — about baby development in the womb, healthy eating for Mom, and what might need to change or disappear from your lifestyle for the duration of the pregnancy.

While you're educating yourselves, though, have confidence in your gut feelings. We, humans, have been doing the baby thing for thousands of years and we've learned a thing or two in the process. We really do know what we're doing, for the most part.

Keep in mind that all physical experiences are self-limiting. Changes to figure, weight, and tastes are temporary and last only as long as the pregnancy. As soon as the baby is born, Mom, you get your body back.

One of the best things I learned to do was keep myself as calm as I could. I firmly believe that thinking "serene" and "placid" thoughts makes for a serene and placid baby.

Work only with a birthing professional (for example, a midwife, OB/GYN doctor, or doula) who sees everyone as part of a team: Mom is the captain/quarterback, calls the shots, and has the last word after getting input from everyone else. If anyone on the team has a problem with that, replace them.

Don't worry about baby clothes too much. Even today's technology isn't perfect at predicting a baby's size. My baby weighed more than eight pounds at birth. She blew right past "newborn" size and went into three-month size baby clothes from the very beginning. I would suggest waiting until after the baby is born to throw a baby shower.

Enjoy the process of growing a baby, your baby.

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